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Her guest hesitated in the doorway, a pained look on her face. “I parked down the street.”
“What?” she asked, confused. When Cathy didn’t answer, the reason dawned on Shae. “Oh, you didn’t want anyone to see your car here.”
“Sorry.” Cathy came further into the room. “I heard about the church.”
Shae sighed. “Of course, you did.” Unbidden, tears began to roll down her cheek. “Dave was so cold, I felt like I didn’t know him.”
“Well, I know it didn’t come as a surprise.”
“No.” Shae noticed how close she clutched her sweater. “Give me that and sit down, I’ll make you a cup of coffee.” She tried to manufacture a faint smile as she moved to the cupboard. “I even bought a second cup at the Dollar Store the other day, so we won’t have to share.” She’d sold Coretta Lee’s china on eBay, intending to buy a cheaper set. Her grandmother had once told her that the expensive Waterford dishes were just dust-catchers anyway. Since then, she’d only picked up a place setting for one, not wanting to lay out the money for additional dishes until the time was right. Same with pots, pans, and silverware, she’d only purchased a minimum.
“I can’t stay.”
Shae stopped in her tracks. “Oh, okay, we’ll have coffee some other time.”
“Shae…”
Cathy’s voice trailed off and Shae could tell what was coming next. She grabbed on to the edge of the cabinet so hard her knuckles turned white. Still, she wanted her friend to finish her sentence, so she said nothing.
“Shae, I can’t come over anymore.”
“Oh?” She racked her brain for a response. “Okay. We can still talk online, we can still…”
“No, I can’t help you.” Her voice dropped to an almost imperceptible level. “Lynn doesn’t want me to have anything to do with you.” Seeing Shae’s chin drop to her chest, she kept talking. “It’s his job. His boss told him that I shouldn’t be your friend anymore, that it wasn’t good for his reputation.”
Shae shook her head. “How did this happen so fast?”
“Marilee ordered the books, she passed them around. You know how quickly word-of-mouth travels in this Podunk little town.”
Hearing the remorse in Cathy’s voice, Shae couldn’t hold the decision against her. “I know, this is juicy gossip. Everyone just found out the town good girl is bad.”
“You’re not bad. Don’t say that.”
Shae fought to contain the sobs that threatened to spill from her mouth. “Ha!” She laughed weakly. “What are they saying, exactly?” Did she want to know?
“You don’t want to know.”
Shae giggled at the absurdity of her thought process. “Yea, I do. I know this town, I know how they can unite for a common cause. I remember when they turned on that woman who supposedly made a pass at that high school student, when all she did was offer him a ride home in the rain.”
“I remember.” Cathy nodded, sadly. “The good people of Longleaf can be like a pack of wild dogs.”
“So, what are they saying?” Shae urged her friend to tell her the truth.
Cathy sighed and leaned against the counter. “They say you’re a fraud, a slut, some even say you’re a devil worshiper.”
“What?” Shae giggled at the absurdity of it all.
“They’re even talking about dismissing Coretta Lee’s nephew-in-law from the bank on a morals clause.”
“Rick isn’t related by blood to me, we’re not even close.”
“I know. I tell you, this is the biggest thing to hit this area since the space shuttle Columbia fell and crashed to the ground behind the pine tree curtain.”
Shae nodded. “Our church and the community responded as one to that disaster.”
“Right,” Cathy agreed. “I remember you helped the children collect socks and gloves for the hundreds of searchers who moved into the area. Nobody talked about anything else for months.”
“Right. The people love to have something to discuss other than an extramarital affair or a bankruptcy.”
“Yea, somebody would have to be murdered to take the heat off you.”
“God, Cathy.” Shae laughed, but knew in her heart she was right. “I guess I shouldn’t sit around and hope for that.”
“I don’t know, depends on who it is. I’ll make a list, I know of a few names I wouldn’t mind writing down.”
Their eyes met, and Shae felt her heart dip. “I’m going to miss you.”
Cathy hugged her. “This will blow over…in a decade or two.”
Shae giggled through her tears. “Yea.”
Taking her by the shoulders, Cathy looked into Shae’s eyes. “I’d move if I were you. I’d get as far from here as I could. Go someplace where you’ll be celebrated, not maligned in this dump of a town.”
“I can’t leave my grandmother. She needs me.”
“I know.” Cathy kissed her on the cheek, then walked out without another word.
* * *
A few days later…
Derek
“Sorry, fella, we’re not hiring right now.”
“I’ll take anything.” Derek couldn’t afford to be choosy. He could live on odd jobs he found around town, but he needed this job for the health insurance.
The sawmill foreman shook his head and frowned, gesturing to the people milling around him. “Hell, I can’t promise any of these men will have jobs much longer. We’re just waiting for the hammer to fall. Rumor has it they’ll be closing the mill soon.”
Derek nodded. “I see. Well, thanks anyway.” He paused for a moment, not sure why. The other man wasn’t going to change his mind. He’d just counted on this so much. “Wow, when a man falls, he can fall far.”
“Where you from, if you don’t mind me asking?”
“Here, a long time ago.” He laughed wryly. “More recently, I’ve been in hell. Before that, I lived with my family in Bastrop. My contracting business was in Austin.”
“And you’re hunting a job at the sawmill?”
“Divorce.”
The man nodded. “Understood. This is a big change from the city. I’m a transplant, moved here from Crockett to run the mill.” He clapped Derek on the back. “Worst decision of my life.” Lowering his voice, he glanced around to make sure he wasn’t being overheard. “My recommendation would be for you to move on, this place is dying. Longleaf is a small town filled with small-minded people.” The foreman nodded over at three men who were staring at something one of them held in their hand. “Look at them, today they’re lambasting some unfortunate soul for not being what they thought she ought to be. They love to see people fail. They feed off another poor fool’s trouble. I’m going to miss my position, but I won’t miss this community.”
“What woman are they talking about?” Not that he knew anyone in town anymore.
“Somebody from the church, everyone thought she was so nice, then they found out she was doing something they didn’t approve of. They’re calling her Magdalene or something” He laughed. “I know I’m not making sense, I’m actually quoting what my assistant said this morning. I’ve seen her around town, her last name’s St. John, her daddy used to be some bigshot, I think the Masonic lodge is even named after him.”
“Glad I’m not involved, I’ve had all the drama I can stand.” He tipped the old Stetson he wore, the one he’d found in his uncle’s closet. “Thanks anyway.”
“Sure thing.”
As he moved by the group of men who’d been laughing earlier, he heard one of them say to another. “Hell, I would’ve asked her out if I’d know she was loose as a goose. Just goes to show you can’t judge a book by its cover, although…” The guy’s voice dropped, and Derek could only make out the words ‘tits’ and ‘ass’.
Shaking his head, Derek moved on. He loved sex as much as the next guy, maybe more – but he couldn’t afford to make even one mistake. Gaining at least joint custody of June had to be his priority.
* * *
Blair
“I have to go, Max. I have a meeting with my lawyer,” Blair told him as she stood with keys in hand. “Cheryl will watch June.”
“No.”
“What do you mean?” Her eyes played along his broad back as he stood looking out the window.
“Are you questioning me?”
“No. I just don’t understand.”
“Your lawyer is coming here. I don’t want you leaving the compound other than to go to work. Soon you won’t have to work anymore.”
“I won’t?” she asked with unease. “I like my job.” Her job was fulfilling. “I’m still working on those videos.”
“I know. For now, you can go to work.”
Blair felt her natural rebelliousness begin to rise. “For now? I can go to work?”
“Your job is in a field that’s part of the problem, not the solution.” Maximillian Provo jerked around, his face a mass of anger. “Also, I don’t like your tone. If you don’t watch yourself, you’ll lose your place in my bed.”
“To who? Cheryl?” she asked with barely concealed jealousy and anger.
“No.” He smiled in a sneering way. “I find my taste might be running to someone younger.”
His answer hit Blair in the gut. “You don’t mean…” She couldn’t even voice the thought.
He raised an eyebrow. “Who knows? You don’t want to test me, do you?”
Knowing what he was capable of, knowing what his plans were, Blair decided not to push the issue. “No, Judge.”
“Fine.” He turned away. “Go back to your room. I’ll call you when your lawyer arrives.”
Blair turned away. She didn’t really have a choice.
* * *
Shae
This was going to be hard.
Shae felt like she was six years old and being sent to the principal’s office. Facing Pastor Dave had been hard enough, but she soon found out that ordeal was just the first rattle out of the box. Her first glimpse at what her new reality would be occurred when she gassed up her car – or tried to. The Quick and Easy was a convenience store she’d shopped at since she was old enough to reach the counter to give the clerk a quarter for the bubble gum she craved. Today, the grizzled little woman who worked the cash register had come running out to tell Shae they didn’t want her business anymore. This embarrassing moment had been witnessed by two or three people who snickered at her predicament. After creeping back into the car, she barely made it to the next gas station about six miles south. There, the new owner, a transplant from Pakistan didn’t care who she was or what she’d written.
Later, she’d stopped at the local Dollar Store to buy a gallon of milk and almost cried when two people turned their carts around instead of moving down the aisle past her. Almost overnight, she’d changed from someone everybody liked and respected to the town pariah. Everywhere she turned, people were staring at her as if she was something they’d scraped off the bottom of their shoe.
Now, she was about to visit her grandmother and the likelihood of seeing Marilee Rose, the woman who might be responsible for this fiasco, was very high. Frankly, Shae didn’t know how she would react, especially if the woman confronted her. After parking, she sat there for a minute, staring at the distance from the car to the entrance of the nursing facility. How far she’d fallen, to dread walking into the home where her own grandmother waited for her.
Stepping from the car, she tried to insert some steel into her spine. The mental exercise caused Shae to stand a little straighter. With precise steps, she walked up the sidewalk and pushed the heavy glass door open. Right away, two things struck her. First, a familiar, slightly unpleasant smell hit her. No matter how hard they tried, the people who managed and cared for the facility couldn’t erase the faint smell of urine that pervaded the air. Second, she noticed as people became aware of her presence, they missed a step, almost as if time froze for a second. After a beat or two, they dropped their gaze and continued on their way. No one spoke to her, not one individual raised their hand in greeting. Shae was left with the uneasy feeling they’d been instructed not to acknowledge her at all.
Bowing her head, she kept her eyes on the floor, placing each foot in the center of a yellowed square of tile. Her mind didn’t count off the steps, she knew the way to Coretta’s room, making the turn by the nurse’s station and veering left. Third room on the right.
Easing open the door, she let out a relieved breath. “Grandmother?”
When she heard no excited greeting, she glanced up and was shocked to see Coretta staring at her coldly.
“Why?”
“Why? What do you mean?” Shae came closer, bending to kiss her cheek, only to be stopped by an upheld hand.
“Why ruin…good name?”
Dismayed, she stood straight and answered calmly, “You know I needed the money for your care. I didn’t know if it would work, but I had to try.”
“Vulgarity!” She spat out the word clearer than any she’d spoken before.
“No, they’re explicit, but tender.”
Her explanation fell on deaf ears. Coretta raised her hand and pointed one arthritic finger in her face. “You sold…house. Things. Can’t trust.”
“You know I did that, I told you I did. Everything I’ve done, I’ve done for you.” She waved her hand at the room. “Your care is expensive. The insurance doesn’t cover it all. Your savings and mine were fast dwindling away. I had no choice.”
“Always have choice,” she muttered stiffly. “Leave. You shame me.”
The elderly lady’s words cut through Shae’s heart like a knife. “I’m so sorry. I just wanted to take care of you. I planned on bringing you home to live with me as soon as you’re better.”
Coretta shook her head. “Leave. You are not my granddaughter.”
Those last words could not be misconstrued, they were the clearest ones her grandmother had ever spoken.
Shae turned to leave and when she made it into the hall with tears streaming down her face, one of the aides called out a word of farewell.
“Good riddance, slut.”
CHAPTER SIX
Present day – about six months later
Shae
When one’s life completely changes, sometimes a person changes also. Shae morphed from an outgoing happy person to one who seldom used her voice to speak aloud. After all, she had no one to talk to. There was the one exception, however.
Every day she went to the nursing home to see Coretta and every day she was turned away. One nurse, by the name of Joyce Williams, took pity on her and would give Shae updates on her grandmother’s condition. As painful as the daily visits were, they were necessary, for Joyce informed her she’d been taken off as the next of kin. If anything happened to Coretta, she wouldn’t be informed by phone. “But I’m responsible for paying her bill!”
“Are you her legal guardian?”
“I’m her granddaughter, my name is on everything.” She didn’t go into details, how the sale of Coretta’s house hadn’t brought what was expected. The real estate market was so depressed in East Texas that a quarter of a million-dollar home in Austin would only bring about fifty thousand in Longleaf. “Her savings and social security only went so far. Medical care is expensive. I’ve done the best I can do.”
“I understand, but there’s nothing we can do but follow her wishes.” Joyce patted Shae’s arm. “My shift begins at three in the afternoon. I work five days a week, sometimes seven. Come when I’m here and I’ll let you know what’s going on.”
“Thank you.” Shae clutched the handle of her purse tightly and nodded. “Well, I guess I’ll be going. I’ll see you tomorrow. Tell her I asked after her.”
“I will.” Joyce eased a little closer to Shae and gave her a secret smile. “I enjoy reading your books. You’re a good writer.”
“Thanks.” The compliment brought her little joy. She’d lost the enthusiasm she once felt. Now, her books seemed like a painful necessity. The money she received from them was even more import
ant now that she had no other source of income. “Don’t tell anyone else that, they’ll shun you like they do me.”
“Ah, let them try. I wasn’t ever one of the popular folks in town, grew up on the wrong side of the tracks.” Joyce winked at Shae. “I say to hell with them.”
To hell with them.
Shae smiled her agreement. “Yea, to hell with them.”
The events of that day were pivotal as Shae began this new phase of her life. She withdrew into herself, like a turtle into its shell. Other than her daily trip to the nursing home, she did all her business out of town, driving over the state line into nearby Toledo Village to do her grocery shopping. She changed banks. Shae moved her postal box to another town so when she needed to mail signed books to fans, she didn’t have to deal with someone who knew her. For most of her time, Shae was alone. The only consolation she allowed herself was a dog, a dachshund adopted from the animal shelter in a nearby county. She named the pup Mojo. Now, Shae had someone to talk to who wanted to hear her voice.
It took time for the desire to write to return. Waiting for inspiration was a luxury she couldn’t possess, but gradually the satisfaction in her stories reappeared. Shae backed off most of her online activity. Instead, she hired a few virtual assistants to help who became indispensable to Shae. They were fans first, and now they were friends, or as much of a friend as a person could be to someone they’d never met in real life. Shae also kept up with a few readers, like Judge Judy, Jo Powers, and others. She was constantly struck by how different she was treated by these people than by those who’d watched her grow up…who knew her better than anyone. For this reason, she was torn between two mindsets: Did she accept the judgment of her peers? Should she quit writing, go back to the church, and beg forgiveness? Would they take her back? Her job was already gone, she knew that. Or did she just live as if no one in this little town mattered? Shae knew she couldn’t feel that way about her grandmother, but everyone else was a different story.