Only Heaven Knows (Hell Yeah!) Read online

  Did he mind? “It would make my day, Bryn.” She came closer to him and he realized he’d get to touch her. He couldn’t explain it, but touching her felt necessary to his sanity. “Let me help you up.” He dismounted, then took her hand in his, holding his breath. The sun was rising in the east, bathing the morning with new light. He’d never been so happy to see a new day dawn. Her ponytail was askew, her jeans were baggy, yet he’d never seen anyone more adorable. “Hold onto the saddle horn, put your right foot in the stirrup and hop up. I’ll steady you.” Oh, the steadying was the fun part. A palm to her back, then to her backside as she maneuvered into the saddle. “Now, I’ll join you.”

  “Okay.” Her voice sounded unsure, but once he settled in behind her, she looked over her shoulder and he’d swear radiance shone from her eyes. She was the fairest of angels tempting the devil himself.

  Then, remembering he was alive and Louis was dead, Denver felt guilty for enjoying the moment.

  “This feels so high up. Don’t let me fall,” she cautioned him.

  “Never.” Being responsible was something he’d failed at in the past, but in this instance, he was up for it. He’d rather break a leg than let this sweetheart fall.

  Bryn felt safe. Who wouldn’t with a six-foot-three mountain of muscle at her back? The T-shirt he wore pulled tight across his chest and the sleeves bunched up around his thick biceps. “I’m not taking you away from your work, am I?” Being around this man made her lightheaded, the air around him seemed more alive than anywhere else.

  “I have time.” He breathed in her fresh scent. “You smell like summer. I like your hair.”

  “You do?” She laughed. See, being different paid off, she told herself. “I’m glad.” His nearness made her heart beat wildly. With his arms around her, his hands holding the reins in front of her, Bryn found it hard to breathe. She wasn’t used to being touched. The sisters at the convent didn’t hug, they didn’t touch anyone else, except in the most basic of ways – accidentally bumping into someone in the hall, the brushing of fingers as an object was passed between them. Nothing intentional, nothing comforting. Bryn always thought it odd that a group of people who were supposed to be devoted to a life of love seldom showed any of that emotion to anyone else. Maybe her adopted parents hugged her, the ones who’d kept her until she was four, the ones who’d brought her back because they couldn’t deal with her – but she wouldn’t let herself try to remember.

  “I think you’re just right,” he murmured softly, then tightened his arm around her when she shivered. “Are you cold?”

  “No.” She shook her head. “I’m good.” There was no way to tell him how she felt, the words didn’t exist in her vocabulary. Instead, she told him something else, not as relevant, but equally true. “I think I’m just antsy. I go out into the world and meet people today. Moving to a new place is a little scary.”

  “I understand. I remember when I left home. You don’t really know what to expect, do you?” He urged Bay into a canter. “Hey, I’m not going to be riding up to meet an irate husband, am I?”

  His question made her laugh. “Hardly. Are you married?”

  “No. Unattached.” Denver tried to make a joke. “Footloose and fancy free.”

  “I guess that makes two of us.” Bryn lifted her face to the sky, admiring the breathtaking palette of colors painting the horizon. “The world is a beautiful place.”

  Denver only had eyes for her. “Beautiful is right.”

  “We should be grateful to be alive,” she sighed, leaning back against his chest.

  Her words prodded a sore spot in his heart, but the sweet weight of her body against his soothed the pain. “I’m glad I found you.”

  “You are?” she asked with joy in her heart. “Who are you, Denver Bolden?”

  “Oh, I’m just a country boy, angel. I work for the McCoys at Tebow Ranch. I’m just one of the hands. How about you? Who is Bryn Harmon?”

  “I don’t know yet,” she answered him honestly. “I’ll be sure to let you know when I figure it out.”

  They rode up to the McBride place and Denver could tell it was as ramshackle as he remembered. No one had made any repairs. “So, you’re living here by yourself?”

  “Yes. I don’t have any family.” She held onto the saddle horn as Denver swung his leg over the saddle and stood to the ground.

  “I know the feeling. I don’t have any…close by. My folks are in Tennessee.” He didn’t add that he hadn’t seen them in years. Frankly, he didn’t know if they’d ever want to see him again. Denver held up his hands. “Let me help you down.”

  She went into his arms and he let her slide down his body to the ground. “Thank you, Denver. Could I offer you some coffee?”

  “I’d really like to accept your kind offer, but I need to get back to my trailer and take a shower. Work comes early on the ranch.” He couldn’t help but notice how rickety the porch steps looked. “You be careful walking on those steps. I’d hate for you to step through a rotten board and break a leg.”

  “Yea, they’re pretty old.” She nodded, chewing on her lower lip. “I’ll be careful.”

  Denver knew he needed to leave, but he didn’t want to ride away without some assurance he would see her another time. “Could I see you again?”

  “Yes, I’d like that.” Bryn smiled happily. “You’ll be my first friend.”

  Friend. Not exactly what he had in mind, but friendship was a good place to start. Could you tell me your number and I’ll give you a call?”

  Bryn shifted on her feet, a slight frown marring her pretty face. “I don’t have a phone. I didn’t think of getting one. I don’t have anyone to call.”

  Her words sounded odd in this day and age. Who didn’t have a phone? “You have someone to call now, Miss Bryn.” His assurance made her smile. “I guess I better be going.” Denver tipped his hat. “I’m glad I ran into you this morning. You made my day.”

  Bryn felt her spirits soar. “I’m glad. You made me happy.”

  With a raised hand, he told her goodbye. As he urged Bay into a gallop, Denver realized he was happy too. A feeling he barely recognized, but welcomed all the same.

  * * *

  “Why don’t you ride into town and pick up the fence posts from Nolan’s sawmill while I make some phone calls?” Lance checked his calendar. “Man, where has the month gone?”

  “Time flies when you’re having fun, boss.” Denver watched out the window, noticing Jacob McCoy backing up to the barn with a trailer full of horses. “Looks like Canyon will have his hands full shoeing the new stock?”

  “Yea, we’re up to our ears in alligators around here. You’d better stop at the hardware store for some fence staples too. I think we’re running low. We go through those like a chicken picking up corn.”

  “How does a chicken pick up corn?” Denver had to ask.

  “Fast.”

  “Okay, I get it.” Denver pushed his gloves into his back pocket. “Did you know someone moved into the old McBride house?”

  Lance shook his head. “Nope, I’ve been too busy to notice.” He glanced at the door. “You’d better hurry on, we’ve got a full afternoon ahead of us.”

  Denver didn’t have to be told twice. He was glad of the opportunity to head to town. He could kill two birds with one stone, pick up the fence posts for Tebow and check on his order for a six-foot mahogany board that he needed to finish the nursery armoire he was building for Isaac and Avery. Thankfully, the matching sleigh crib was ready and waiting for the baby’s arrival. Denver knew the due date was near, he was running out of time. Crafting furniture relaxed him. Working with his hands seemed to take his mind off his troubles.

  Once he was behind the wheel, Denver refused to fall into the same old trap of reliving his failures. Instead, he let his mind wander to the gorgeous woman he’d met this morning. As he drove by the lane leading to her house, he wondered what she was doing today. Unfortunately, he couldn’t call and find out. “Hmmm,” he mused
as an idea occurred to him. Maybe he ought to get her a phone, a plain one. He couldn’t afford anything too expensive. If he presented her with a cell, she’d probably accept his call. “Yea, that’s what I’ll do.”

  With a mission in mind, he turned from the ranch road onto the main highway. The route from Tebow into Kerrville was scenic, the Guadalupe River ran alongside the road for half the distance, a ribbon of tranquility flowing beneath a canopy of trees. Denver paid little attention to the view today, he had other things on his mind. Soon, he was pulling into Nolan’s Sawmill and Lumberyard, backing up to the loading dock where the fence posts were kept.

  …In town, Bryn’s day wasn’t going so well. She’d successfully transferred all the utilities into her name, but after that, her luck seemed to run out. After putting her application in at two places and being promptly turned down, she realized the experience she’d garnered working in the convent didn’t seem to count for very much in her search for employment. Over the years, she’d tended children at the orphanage, kept the mother house and sanctuary clean, tended the garden, and served in the kitchen. None of this impressed the day care center or the restaurant where she’d inquired about a job. The last place she’d tried was the video arcade next to the hardware store. No luck there either, but she was certainly intrigued by the games. The bright colors and cheerful sounds fascinated her. Even after they’d rejected her request for a position, she’d wandered among the machines, wishing she had the money to spend to try them out.

  “Oh, well, moving on,” she muttered, pushing her way through the heavy glass door. Once she was on the sidewalk again, Bryn held her hand above her eyes to shield them from the sun. Refusing to be disheartened, she plotted her next move. “Okay, where to now?”

  “Bryn?”

  Bryn whirled around, recognizing the deep, raspy tone. She couldn’t keep from smiling, glad to run into someone familiar. “Denver! Fancy seeing you again.”

  “Apparently, today’s my lucky day.” His eyes swept her small form, appreciating her beauty in the clear light of day. She was dressed simply, in a cotton yellow sundress. He thought she was enchanting. “I’m glad I ran into you.” He held out a phone. “Here, I’ve already entered my number in your contacts.”

  Bryn was blown away. “You bought this for me?”

  His heart warmed as she stared at the phone, then at him, with abject wonder in her eyes. “It’s nothing fancy, just a phone. Now, let’s see if it works.” He pressed a button and the cell buzzed in her hand. “Well, answer it.” When she hesitated, he pointed. “Press the green button.”

  Bryn’s hand shook as she followed his directions, raising it to her ear. “Hello?”

  “Hey, Bryn, this is Denver Bolden.”

  His silly antics thrilled Bryn to pieces. “Hello, Denver. What a nice surprise. I didn’t expect to hear from you today.”

  Denver loved that she readily played with him. “You should have, you made quite an impression on me this morning.” When she blushed, he felt his chest grow tight. “I was wondering if you might find room in your busy schedule to have dinner with me tomorrow evening.”

  “Hmmm, hold on, let me check my calendar. I’m quite booked, you know.”

  To his delight, she held the phone away from her face, tilted her head up in the air and whistled a little tune. After a quick moment, she brought the phone back to her lips.

  “I think I can squeeze you in.”

  Denver had to close his eyes as his cock surged to life. He could just imagine how tight she could squeeze him. “Great!” he choked out the word. “I’ll pick you up at six. Think of anything else you might want to do, and we’ll do it.” He knew he could think of several things, all involving him getting his hands on her.

  “How about the arcade?” She pointed behind her. “It looks like fun.”

  “If that’s what you want, honey, you got it.” As long as he was able to spend time with Bryn, he wouldn’t argue about the location.

  “Thanks for calling.” She held his gaze, her smile wide and sweet. “Bye, now.”

  “Bye, doll.”

  Once he ended the call, he felt almost shy standing in front of her. “Thanks for agreeing to go out with me.”

  “No, thank you for the phone and the invitation.” She stepped close and hugged his neck. “I haven’t had the chance to do anything since coming to town. I welcome the company.”

  Two things bothered him. One, the embrace happened so fast, he almost missed it. And two, the way she phrased her response, Denver wasn’t sure Bryn realized they were going on a date. Oh well, he’d have plenty of time to convince her of that fact once their evening began. He also hoped to lure her back into his arms as quickly as possible. “So, what are you doing in town?” Bryn’s face fell, and he immediately wanted to fix whatever problem she might be having.

  “Hunting a job and not having much luck, so far.” She was a bit ashamed to admit her failure. “I don’t seem to have the qualifications they’re looking for.”

  She folded her arms across her chest and hugged herself. Denver couldn’t help but notice her shape, she was a perfectly feminine little doll. “I imagine you’re over-qualified for most jobs around here.”

  “Not at all.” She hung her head. “I’ve never had a paying job before.”

  “Well, we all have to start somewhere. I’m sure you’ll find something.” He looked up and down the street. Only a few people were stirring, most everyone was either at their job or still at home at this early hour. “Tomorrow, if you’ll tell me what you’re looking for, I’ll try to point you in the right direction.” He glanced over at the ranch truck, noticing the items loaded in the back. “Oh, dammit.”

  “What is it?” Bryn asked, seeing his expression cloud with concern.

  “Oh, hell,” Denver muttered as he walked to the tail gate of the pick-up, pointing to a piece of lumber protruding past the fence posts, a red flag hanging from its end. “This board is at least a foot too short. I needed a six-foot length and it looks like this one’s five feet. The board was a special order, Cuban Mahogany, I can’t get another one in time to finish the project.”

  “Oh, I’m sorry.” Bryn wanted to help, but she had to be careful. “You need it to be six-foot, you say?”

  “Yea, Isaac McCoy, he’s one of my bosses, his wife is expecting a baby any day now. They asked me to build a matching crib and armoire for the nursery. This was the last piece I needed to complete the decorative panel across the top.”

  His distress hurt Bryn’s heart. “Maybe it’s pushed further back in the bed, maybe it’s longer than you think.”

  “No…” Denver was about to speak when his cell rang. “Excuse me,” he glanced at her, then answered, turning a little to the side away from her. “This is Denver.”

  Taking advantage of his attention being elsewhere, Bryn touched the end of the dark hued lumber and blessed it, willing the dead wood to grow. The surface of the board grew warm in her hand. As she heard him end the call, Bryn pulled her arm back and took one step to the side.

  “Sorry, that was the boss. I’ve got to go back into the hardware store and pick up some paint.” He gave her a wink and a smile. “I’m looking forward to spending time with you. Thanks for agreeing to see me.”

  “You’re welcome. I can’t wait for tomorrow,” she assured him as he stepped backward toward the store entrance, giving her a look she couldn’t quite define, a look that made her feel warm all over.

  …Later, when Denver was unloading the posts and other supplies from the back of the truck, his eyes fell on the lone piece of mahogany. “What the hell?” He picked it up and stood the board next to him. “Huh? How did I misjudge you so bad, Mr. Board?” Denver stood six-foot three and the piece of lumber was almost as tall as he was. “Well, good. Whew!” He laughed at himself. “Will wonders never cease. This is one time I’m glad to be wrong.”

  His mood was light. After all, he had a date with a pretty girl to look forward to.

&nbs
p; CHAPTER TWO

  Denver flipped on the radio, singing along with a rowdy country number. He’d enjoyed a fairly decent day, riding range and checking the fence. The next week would be spent replacing worn fence posts and stringing new wire. There was one section of fence that seemed to always be down. He’d wondered why until one day he just happened to be riding the north section of property looking for a lost cow and calf. As he’d topped the ridge, he noticed one of Jacob’s prize bulls standing near the fence, sending out a challenging bellow to a neighboring bull. Denver didn’t have to watch long to see the scenario play out. He’d laughed when he realized the Tebow bull, the one they called Candy Man, was feeling jealous of the handsome cows the other bull had in his harem. The first step in the process was a bellowing match, followed by Candy proceeding to lay down on the fence. Denver had shaken his head in disbelief as he saw the big Brahman actually lean on the fence, putting his full weight on the posts, until they gave way and fell over. Then, he promptly stepped over and set out to woo his competitor’s ladies. This particular time, Candy had to take part in a Mexican stand-off where he and his nemesis faced off and pawed the ground, shaking their horns, and puffing air from their nostrils. Since the big, white menace outweighed the neighbor’s bull by about half a ton, he prevailed and won the right to court the particular bovine lady who was in heat, thereby planting his seed for future posterity. Just the memory of the incident made him smile. Basically, males were males, regardless of their species. As far as Candy Man was concerned, they’d moved him to a section of pasture where he had no neighbors to lust after.

  As one song faded into another, Denver sung along, his spirits as high as his expectations. He was looking forward to the evening. The idea of spending more time with Bryn made him smile.

  Seeing someone on the side of the road, he slowed down. As he drew nearer, Denver could see two teens riding horses side by side. When he was close enough to identify them, he saw it was young Nathan McCoy and a girl he didn’t recognize. When Nathan saw Denver, he raised his hand in a salute. The sight of the young man having a good time hit Denver hard. All he could think was how much Louis had missed out on. If it weren’t for his stupid mistake, his error in judgment, his brother would be alive today. Sometimes he wondered how long this guilt would last. A lifetime? Of course, he didn’t get much of a chance to forget. His parents wouldn’t let him. The only communication he received from them were reminders of his sin. Their unforgiving nature wouldn’t allow Denver to forgive himself.